Changing 60,000 Habits a Day for a Fulfilling Life
If I gave you the task of choosing one new habit to help you create a more fulfilling life, what would you choose? Obviously, that habit would need to impact your life on a multitude of levels. It would need to improve your physical health, your mental state, your financial wellness, and more. How would you choose? Knowing that this habit would need to touch a large part of our lives, we have to ask ourselves, what are we already doing regularly that we can improve?
We eat 3 meals a day. Perhaps adding more fruits and veggies will get us into a better state?…Doesn’t seem like a “life-changing” habit, does it?
We sleep 8 hours (or should, if we’re following the research). Putting the phone away from our beds and blacking out our room can help us there….Still not feeling wowed?
We work 8-10 hours a day. Maybe a career change is in order? Seem a little unrealistic?
We should all exercise more, how about an hour of exercise day? Not enough time in the day, you say?
Don’t get me wrong, those could all be the answer to a more positive and productive life. But what if there was something in your daily life that permeated ALL of those parts. The sleep, the exercise, work, nutrition, and more?
If you knew you performed this habit 60,000 times in a day, would it seem impactful? Would that start to make a difference in how your life played out?
The average person has more than 60,000 thoughts every, single, day. Of those 60K thoughts, 90% are repetitive, and 80% are negative. You are bombarded with an average of 50 negative thoughts every minute you are awake. Do these sound familiar?
“What’s the point of going to work? No one appreciates what I do,”
“I’ll never get back to how I felt in high school/college/the past.”
“I’m not good enough to be here.”
“I shouldn’t be eating this.”
“My friends never call me anymore.”
If it’s not enough that these thoughts are beating us down basically by the second….45 of those 50 negative thoughts are the same thoughts you had yesterday. Imagine having a leader that told you how bad you were at your job every single minute, and only used the same 4 times you messed up to remind you? You wouldn’t stay there very long. And yet, we do this to ourselves daily.
So, back to that habit. If you could develop a habit that changed the message you were playing in your head every minute, how would that change your life? Could you feel more productive at work? Would your relationships with your family improve? Perhaps sticking to a new diet regime would finally seem feasible. If you feel that way, that’s because it’s true. Freeing your mind of the “mind trash” is the first step in realizing a better you.
Practices from Positive Psychology
Introducing, Positive Psychology. A new(ish) branch of psychology that focuses on developing a FLOURISHING human, instead of drumming up the pains of the past. While different practices have benefitted different individuals, Positive Psychology is designed to help individuals find more meaning, fulfillment, and purpose in their life. If it seems hokey, consider this:
Optimism was scientifically found to reduce the chance of a cardiovascular event (e.g. heart attack)
Practices like Fordyce's happiness programme, positive writing, and gratitude were shown to significantly decrease signs of depression and significantly increase well-being.
Students who regularly focused on their progress over a month period were significantly less anxious than those that did not.
Healthier hearts, longer lives, less depression, more fulfillment….sounds like a dream, doesn’t it? But it doesn’t take a zen monk or a hyper-performer to see results. It simply takes intention and attention. Here are a few habits and books to consider as you think about how your life could be made better with more positive thoughts.
Healthier Thought Habits
Here are some habits I practice regularly to be more conscious of my thoughts:
Gratitude Journal - Yes, writing it down! Most of us may think we’re too advanced for some good old pen-to-paper, but slowing down our thoughts is exactly what we’re trying to do, and there’s no better way than writing it out. Start with 2 minutes a day, and see where it takes you!
Mindfulness Meditation (5 minute video, worth it) - You can’t always control your thoughts, but if you can recognize when they are happening, and SEPARATE your thoughts from the emotions they elicit, you have a better chance of not getting carried away from them.
What Went Wells - Straight from the man himself, Martin Seligman (considered one of the founding fathers of Positive Psychology), writing down three things that went well each day, and HOW you contributed to them not only lets you see what good things are happening, but what you did to make it so.
Books to Read
10% Happier (Dan Harris) - Bringing the practice of meditation to business people, busy moms, soccer dads, and all us “normal” people. (Great app as well)
Flourish (Martin Seligman) - Talks about PERMA, the 5 things to make a meaningful life.
The Good Life (Robert Waldinger, Marc Schulz) - The secrets to happiness from the longest scientific study on happiness.
Think Like a Monk (Jay Shetty) - How living like a monk can be translated to the modern, fast-paced world we live in.
Pick one thing. Just one. Start it for 2 minutes a day, in the morning before the rest of the world needs you. Get it done daily for a week, and check in with yourself on how you feel.
Want better thoughts and habits, but not sure where to start?
I help already successful people optimize their well-being though strategy, so they can perform higher and live better. If this article resonated with you, but you’re not sure where to begin, set up a 30 minute chat with me. I’m happy to help.
